nebulochaotic | memory share; random

You know, you never told me you were a badass.

[He'll focus on her fighting-- not the rest that he has ten thousand questions about that he won't force on her.]

Edited 2020-07-19 01:42 (UTC)

You know, you never asked. I feel like that's not coming out of nowhere, though, and I'm kind of afraid to ask what you saw...

( It was probably only a matter of time, anyway, right? )

Man, I gotta start asking, cause there might be a whole bunch of hidden badasses out here.

Yeah... you guessed right. They dropped one of your memories on me. I don't where you were-- looked like some fucked up prison.

( There's a long pause and a soft sigh. )

It was an asylum. Eichen House? Yeah, that's an insane asylum. Please don't ask why I was there because it's an incredibly long and painful story but... I'm guessing you saw me trying to break out. Actually getting out was all Stiles.

( And Theo, but screw Theo. )

I'm not really one to dig for answers that aren't mine to have, Lydia, if you wanted me to know, you would have told me. But we obviously can't stop this bullshit from happening. I kind of fucking hate it.

At least you got out. That's the main thing.

You're in the minority then. I think most people don't even realize necessarily that it's frustrating for them to ask because it's reflexive. So, good on you. And yeah...I hate it.

I did and I grew in the wake of it, so I'll take what victories I can get.

I'm not most people.

[In so, so many ways.]

Every victory is worth celebrating-- shitty circumstances behind them or not.

I'm starting to learn that.

( Lydia nods even though he can't see it. )

Yeah. We definitely agree on that.

[ The video starts and it's like Max definitely wanted to say something, but he doesn't know what to say. ]

Hey— you told me when you saw one of my memories so I— I thought I'd repay the favor and tell you too.

[ He shakes his head though, because just what did he just see exactly? ]

I'm sorry.

( Lydia sort of...deflates, frowning slightly. )

Thanks for letting me know. What'd you see, exactly...?

( She wonders if it's the same thing that Diego saw or whether it's something different... )

[ Some total creep sticking you with needles and about to do something EXTRA creepy before you totally kicked the shit out of a bunch of guards? ]

You were catatonic. Until you weren't anymore.

[ Yeah maybe a better approach? Unclear. ]

And then you really kicked ass.

( Lydia's lips press together and she nods, just once. It's weird for her remembering that, actually, because it's like her memory is split; half of it is with Meredith in the astral plane trying to learn and the other half is being abused by the Eichen House staff while catatonic. )

Yeah...cool, so I'd say now that you've seen me at my lowest, it can only go up from here but that wasn't actually even my lowest point, so... My life was really weird back home. Like, bad weird. Clearly.

( She runs a hand through her hair and shrugs a little, frowning slightly. )

But...yeah I can fight. So there's that, I guess.

Honestly ... given how many guards? nurses? whatever they were — that you fought off, I definitely wouldn't call that your lowest.

[ A beat, because yes, this is still ... super weird for him. ]

How'd you learn to fight like that?

I meant the catatonic bit and the way I kind of gave up after I saw Ethan.

[ Resigned, more like. All the same. ]

Oh, uh...one of our town's deputies taught me. I got tired of needing to be saved and asked if he'd teach me how to defend myself. The rest is my scream. It kind of gives me a boost.

Yeah.

[ A quiet beat. ]

You don't have to answer this, but who was that guy? Why'd you stop fighting? From what I saw, it seemed like you totally could've taken them.

[ The scream thing he is totally gonna ask about later. ]

( Lydia gives him a small smile that falls a little short of her eyes and nods like she expected that question to come eventually from someone. It hurts a lot less after several years have gone by but the sting still isn't gone entirely. )

No, it's okay. I don't mind.

( She takes a breath to steel herself for it and then explains. )

At the time, I thought he was my boyfriend, Aiden. Aiden died a little while before that, just shy of a year. He had a twin, Ethan, but I knew that Ethan had left town, so when I saw him...I just thought I was seeing a ghost of Aiden or something. I'm a banshee, so I'm pretty accustomed to all things death by now, but back then, I was still trying to figure out what all being a banshee meant, so it seemed plausible.

I stopped fighting because I thought he wasn't really there to fight, but also seeing him again for the first time since he died threw me off long enough for them to get in there with the wands. Those were essentially cattle prods, so...you try getting shocked by a couple of those things and keep fighting. I can't even begin to describe the pain of being essentially electrocuted while soaked to the bone in the rain. You wouldn't want me to try, even if I could.

[ Max listens, partially because he's curious, but mostly because if he saw the memory and asked the question, Lydia deserves his full attention when she chooses to actually answer him.

What she ends up telling him though, is so much more unexpected than he thought. A dead ex. His re-surfacing twin. Max has no idea what a banshee is, but he doesn't ask, just nods along. And then, yeah, the cattle prods. ]

I'm sorry Lydia. [ This was, maybe the first time he's said her name out loud? ] I can't imagine how much that hurt. All of it. [ A beat. ] Actually. No, I— I felt how much that hurt. It was agonizing. I'm so sorry.

( Lydia would probably appreciate his sympathy more if she wasn't so suddenly taken aback by the revelation that he felt it. She'd felt Allison's memory, but she just assumed that it was because she'd felt that in real life, too, when it had happened. It never occurred to her that she might've felt it because she was that deep in Allison's memory. So she looks up sharply at Max, her eyebrows lifted. )

You felt that? Oh, my God...

( That changes things, actually. There's a lot more to this memory stuff than she'd realized originally and it makes her really worried. )

Sorry, I...didn't realize.

[ He feels instantly guilty when Lydia tells him that she didn't know, because that means that maybe not everyone is experiencing being the person in the same way he is when he experiences these memories. Even if he didn't have a choice, it feels like he's invaded her privacy on a whole new level. ]

No— please, don't be sorry. It's not your fault. [ Max is talking faster than he has been, mostly because he feels badly — REALLY badly. ] It's— [ He pauses, because he doesn't even know whose fault it even is. ] Look. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have been able to see any of that.

( Lydia drops her head into her hand and then runs that hand up into her hair for a moment before looking back up at him. She holds that same hand up to stop him and shakes her head. )

No, it's okay, don't be sorry. It's not your fault. I imagine some idiot at H.E.R.O. was messing around with the portals again. They're trying to fix them to send us home but instead, they just keep making stupid things happen to us in the meantime because they can't get it right. Someone needs to just stop those idiots and let the intelligent adults handle it.

( By whom she means herself and Number Five. And Peter Parker, if he ever makes it back. )

God...

( Sighing, Lydia shakes her head again. )

It's okay. It's just...it's fine, I'm just sorry you had to feel it.

( Lydia sits up straighter suddenly, pausing with a thoughtful expression. )

...I wonder if that's happening to everyone... I felt one of the memories I saw, but I felt it in real life, too, when it happened because of the...banshee thing, but maybe I felt it again this time because we're not just remembering these things, we're re-experiencing them like they happened to us...

( Which puts Prim's experience of remembering her friend Eddie's horrible death in a whole new perspective that makes Lydia's expression drop. Because, actually, come to think of it, remembering Prim's made her so upset because she'd felt that pain even though Prim had made it sound too quick to have felt it.

Now she's talking more to herself than to Max, when she goes on. )

No...that's what's happening. That's what's happening to us. How in the holy hell...?

[ Max nods along, taking a deep breath here and there as he watches Lydia process everything herself. He'd say something, too, but Lydia seems to be on a roll, and Max just decides to listen and give her the space to figure this stuff out loud with him.

If figuring it out was even possible.

When she asks that last question though, he has to say something. ]

So— I think your theory that this is portal-fixing-related is probably the most likely thing. But um ... no one who's been portal-ed here, has the power to mine or transfer memories right? Or maybe, has the scientific knowledge to do it with technology? I know me asking this is kinda weird, but back home, there was this TV show where someone invented something that could mine people's memories and make other people experience them. COMPLETELY FICTIONAL. [ He can't stress that enough. ] But given how things are here, I ... figured I'd ask?

( Lydia shrugs and shakes her head, lips pursing slightly. )

I don't know. I don't think so, but then again, I wouldn't cop to it if that was my ability and all of this started happening, so who knows?

It's actually not that weird that you're asking, all things considered. But here's the thing...what's fictional to you might be totally real on another Earth. Example: are werewolves real on your home Earth? Because they are where I came from.

( She looks away thoughtfully. )

I've dated a couple, actually...

( Her attention returns back to Max. )

HERO seems to be making it their business to manifest things here that maybe they didn't have before; things that came through with Supers. So, like, a few months ago, there was this guy who was using a watch, or something, that he stole from there and it emitted a special sort of sound that hypnotised people for him. He was just a regular guy, like a disgruntled ex-employee, I think, according to the papers. Right, but that watch probably belonged to a Super. There was a Displaced Super here before that lived with a friend of mine and she complained about them stealing the tech she'd had on her but then she brushed it off because she said they gave her the ability to do what the tech allowed her to do, so it was whatever. But the more I think about it, the less whatever that actually is.

What if there's someone who came through, I don't know, with the last wave of Supers who had tech that allowed them to extract people's memories and make other people experience them and now HERO has it? I can't imagine that we don't all have something in common, I mean...we are the only ones who came through the portal in Florida and we're the only ones allowed to use the portals to DC and California, so...if they won't let the locals use them, why not? Does it put some kind of signature on us? And, if it does, that would explain why none of the locals seem to experience the same stupid crap we do.

( Now she's all worked up and science-minded, chewing on her bottom lip and considering, wondering whether Scott or Allison would let her run some tests on blood samples or something if she can find a lab that'll let her do it. )

I need a lab... Like, a science lab. I think I might actually be onto something...

Wow. [ He says slowly, his own brain trying to process everything Lydia just theorized into its natural potential consequences. ] I think you really are onto something.

Because no, we didn't have werewolves back home — at least, none that a regular guy like me would know about. But there was an endless amount of fiction about super tech, or magic, or a whole ton of mind-bending powers.

Do you think they're ... trying to find a way to give normal people powers?

[ He blinks a few times. ]

Well, that ... kinda already worked on me. I guess? Hmmm.

( Lydia gives Max a knowing look when he asks that question, her eyebrows lifted and expression pointed. That expression softens into something more affirmative. )

You just answered your own question. So yeah, I think that's one of the things they're probably doing. I think there are a lot of experiments they're doing off the public record and I think that we're going to continue to suffer in the wake of them because why not? No one really cares about a bunch of illegal aliens, right? We literally don't belong here. We probably don't even legally exist here, if you think about it. So why not use us as guinea pigs. If the experiment goes well and nothing happens, no one's the wiser. If the experiment goes poorly and it only affects the illegals that a pretty decent chunk of the locals see as a drain on their society, then who cares, right?

( Maybe she's being unintentionally hyperbolic here, but...can he really blame her? )

[ It's definitely a more cynical take, but Max doesn't really have any arguments otherwise. ]

If we really go down that road then ...

[ He pauses a beat. ]

Well. Then they'd have no real motivation to actually send us all back home then.

I don't think they are trying to send us home, sweetie. I haven't thought that in a while, actually. They benefit more from having us here than sending us back, in my opinion.

...

[ Max looks like he's trying to process what she just said — more emotionally than logically.

It's occurred to him, sure, that maybe the government isn't really doing what it said it would. But it still hurts a bit to hear someone else say it out loud.

Max isn't sure he believes it yet, without getting some kind of tangible evidence he can touch, but part of him has been fearing that this has been the case all along. ]

( Lydia nods and sighs. )

All right, well, I'm going to leave you to percolate on that, hon.

Yeah, uh— I'll ... catch you later.

[ He gestures a good-bye with his hand before closing out the video.

Ma xis already thinking about how he needs to dig more into things at work, before he allows himself to assume this is what happening. But sharing that with Lydia doesn't seem quite right for this conversation. ]

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closing this one out too!